Dating and The Divorced Mid-Life Woman

QUESTION

My mom and dad are divorced and mom is starting to date. I think that the guys are all creeps but she says she is lonely. How can I get her to slow down and go out with a better class of guy?

ANSWER

VICKI:
The fact is that you can’t get your mom to slow down. She has a choice and though you consider then men she dates creeps, she may see them from a different point of view. You haven’t mentioned if you and your mom have had a conversation around how you feel about her dating and the types of men she dates. If you haven’t spoken to her please do. Sit her down and tell her, honestly, how you feel. Don’t make the conversation strictly about how your view her male friends, it’s very important that you tell her how you feel about her dating period as this may be a factor to you not liking the men she dates. One more thing she may have really good reason for dating the men she does please do really listen to her.

JILL:
I’m going to come at this from a different angle. You need to think about the fact that your mom is more than just a mom. She is a lonely, divorced woman. That is the person who is the doing the dating. I would like you to try to communicate with some of the men that are in her life; just talk to them. If then you find they are disrespectful, creepy or just don’t seem to be a nice person then you should let your mother know how you feel about that particular man. I just want you to give some of them a chance. However your mom does owe it to you to make sure that the men she invites into your home are decent and treat you well.